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Author Topic: Chiltern Railways has a cunning plan...  (Read 5527 times)
JayMac
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« on: May 14, 2012, 05:08:47 »

... but it looks like it is of the same standard as those dreamed up by a certain Mr S. Baldrick.

From the BBC» (British Broadcasting Corporation - home page):

Quote
Blackadder star helps staff learn train announcements

Blackadder star Tony Robinson has helped coach rail staff to deliver new "comedy" announcements.

Written by Richard Preddy, who wrote the sitcom Green Wing, the announcements aim to make the Birmingham to London journey enjoyable.

In one, passengers listening to "noisy iPods" will be advised to get a better taste in music.

Robinson, who played Baldrick, spent a month helping Chiltern Railways staff learn the lines.

The announcements will also be heard at London Marylebone Station.

'Racing Underground trains'

Preddy said: "We have all waited for a train or a bus into work as the rain pours down and bustled our way to a seat and I think comedy can help to alleviate that stress. Everyone we met was so enthusiastic and the feedback so far has been fantastic. It's important to note that we aren't trying to turn everyone into a comedian. Rather we are hoping to bring out a little more of the staff's personality and humour via their day-to-day announcements and help cheer up the commuters along the way."

The announcements passengers will hear include:

- "I'd like to welcome passengers boarding this 7.33 from Birmingham Moor Street to London Marylebone. If you've just bumped into someone who you barely know, you now have one hour and 30 minutes of awkward small talk. Good luck."

- "For any passengers who've not visited London before, do please prepare yourselves for the capital's overwhelmingly calm and relaxing pace of life."

- "We will shortly be passing through West Ruislip where we will be racing the Underground trains. Do please feel free to cheer for our driver."
   
- "Will any passengers listening to noisy iPods please get a better taste in music. Thank you."

Maybe I'm having a sense of humour failure here, but is there any point to this? Can a few silly announcements really relieve stress? And isn't that stress often the fault of the rail industry anyway?

At least Chiltern aren't publicly accountable for the money wasted on this.
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- Sir Terry Pratchett.
bobm
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« Reply #1 on: May 14, 2012, 09:49:49 »

I tend to agree with you bignosemac.  They might be funny the first time you hear them but if you are a regular user and here them repeated they can become irritating and stress inducing!

I used to have a Sat Nav with John Cleese on it.  It was ok to begin with but after a while his comments became predicatable and the humour was lost.
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Andrew1939 from West Oxon
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« Reply #2 on: May 14, 2012, 17:01:12 »

I quite agree with Bobm.
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6 OF 2 redundant adjunct of unimatrix 01
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« Reply #3 on: May 14, 2012, 17:10:58 »

im sorry to anounce that this service is delayed due to .... um .... 'I'm a complete duffer at this sort of thing. In the School Debating Society I was voted 'boy least likely to complete a coherent^' erm...
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JayMac
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« Reply #4 on: May 14, 2012, 17:12:05 »

This is a tie-in with TV station GOLD:

http://uktv.co.uk/gold/homepage/sid/9191

The full list of 'amusing' announcements can be found here:

http://uktv.co.uk/gold/item/aid/652281

At least it's only for one week. More a case of a marketing ploy rather than a serious attempt to de-stress passengers I think.  Roll Eyes
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« Reply #5 on: May 14, 2012, 17:29:44 »

Hmmm.... Undecided
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Chris from Nailsea
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« Reply #6 on: May 15, 2012, 17:35:19 »

From the Oxford Mail:

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Heard the one about the cancelled 07.52?

Rail staff have a cunning plan for new announcements.

Passengers on trains through Oxfordshire will be treated to comedy timing thanks to Blackadder star Tony Robinson.

Mr Robinson, who played dim-witted Baldrick in the hit series, spent a month giving Chiltern Railways workers tips on how to deliver comedic announcements specially penned by sitcom writer Richard Preddy.

Gone are the straight-laced announcements about stations along the Birmingham to London Marylebone route, which include Banbury, Bicester North and Haddenham and Thame Parkway stations.

Instead commuters will hear a series of one-liners aiming to put a smile on even the grumpiest Monday morning face.

They include:
- We will shortly be passing through West Ruislip where we will be racing the Underground trains. Do please feel free to cheer for our driver.
- Our next station stop is Bicester, which is the second most wrongly pronounced station on this line, above Haddenham and Thame, but behind London Marlbon. Marlybon. Mary Lee Bone. You know what I mean.
- Next stop: Banbury, which is famous for its canals. It^s a little known fact that Banbury actually has fewer canals than Venice.

Passengers will also be invited to join in an interactive game calling out when you see a horse, and offered pearls of wisdom such as ^If you^re at work and you^re not sure what to do, just walk quickly and look worried^.

The move was last night welcomed by passengers.

Bicester commuter Stephen Wynne-Jones said: ^I travel into London on Chiltern Railways every day and I^ve not heard an announcement like this ^ but I hope I do soon. Anything that helps makes me smile as we approach the city can only be a good thing.^

Chris Bates, of the Cherwell Rail Users Group, said: ^It^s a good bit of marketing.^ But he said it might not have the same effect if the train was running late.

Mr Preddy, who wrote the quirky Channel 4 sitcom Green Wing, said: ^It was fascinating to meet the Chiltern staff and a wonderful, if challenging, project to work on. We have all waited for a train or a bus into work as the rain pours down and bustled our way to a seat, and I think comedy can help alleviate that stress. Everyone we met was so enthusiastic and the feedback so far has been fantastic.

Mr Robinson said: ^Rail commuters can get a bit glum, but we^ve come up with a cunning plan to put smiles on their faces. We chose four of their staff, all renowned for their sense of fun, and when we first heard them make their new announcements during our practice run at Marylebone Station, they had Richard and I in stitches.^

Announcements include
- I^d like to welcome passengers boarding this 7.33 from Birmingham Moor Street to London Marylebone. If you^ve just bumped into someone who you barely know, you now have one hour and 30 minutes of awkward small talk. Good luck.
- Will any passengers listening to noisy iPods please get a better taste in music. Thank you.
- For any passengers who^ve not visited London before, do please prepare yourselves for the relaxing pace of life.
- We are pleased to announce that the distance between Birmingham Moor Street and Solihull has not been adjusted.
- If you are thinking of falling asleep on your neighbour^s shoulder please warn them first if you^re likely to dribble.
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William Huskisson MP (Member of Parliament) was the first person to be killed by a train while crossing the tracks, in 1830.  Many more have died in the same way since then.  Don't take a chance: stop, look, listen.

"Level crossings are safe, unless they are used in an unsafe manner."  Discuss.
TonyK
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« Reply #7 on: May 15, 2012, 18:31:31 »

Contrived scripts, especially when trailed in the press in advance, are no substitute for the impromptu utterance. Like "delayed because of a failed Virgin at Watford", or a frustrated "cancelled because of a bloody cock-up", both reported in the press in previous years.
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