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grahame
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« on: February 15, 2017, 20:44:44 » |
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I'll start - see in a knick-knack shop in a tourist place:  |
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Coffee Shop Admin, Acting Chair of Melksham Rail User Group, Option 24/7 Melksham Rep
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Chris from Nailsea
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« Reply #1 on: February 15, 2017, 21:11:49 » |
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Seen on the gate at an address to which I actually delivered only this morning: two signs, in similar style, fixed one above the other. Beware of the Dog Be afraid of the Wife ... and, from a plaque on the wall at another of my delivery addresses: Here, on 14 October 1782 nothing happened    |
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William Huskisson MP▸ was the first person to be killed by a train while crossing the tracks, in 1830. Many more have died in the same way since then. Don't take a chance: stop, look, listen.
"Level crossings are safe, unless they are used in an unsafe manner." Discuss.
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LiskeardRich
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« Reply #2 on: February 15, 2017, 21:43:13 » |
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Grahame where to can I leave my kids in exchange for a puppy? My wife won't let me have one! |
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All posts are my own personal believes, opinions and understandings!
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JayMac
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« Reply #3 on: February 15, 2017, 22:14:37 » |
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The sign in the OP▸ raised a slight chuckle.
My pedant radar went mad though! On zooming in a bit, I see a fellow pedant corrected the smelling pistake.
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"Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the rest of the day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
- Sir Terry Pratchett.
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chrisr_75
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« Reply #4 on: February 16, 2017, 01:04:29 » |
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"This door is alarmed" has to be one of the all time classics! I have a book full of these somewhere, if I can find it I'll share a few of the best nuggets  |
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grahame
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« Reply #5 on: February 16, 2017, 07:50:58 » |
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The original sign was from a souvenir shop (I'm sure they would have preferred an upmarket label though) the best part of a decade ago in Harper's Ferry, West Virginia. Rickwarwicker - I'm sure they will long have run out of puppies there by now - but there are excellent rescues that will match your family (without the need to give up your children) to you. If you find it doesn't work out ... there's always this solution - from an advert ... My wife doesn't like my dog, so I appeal to you. She is a purebred from a wealthy area and I have had her 4 years. She likes to play games. Not totally trained. Has long hair so she's a little high maintenance, especially the nails, but she loves having them done. Stays up all night yapping but sleeps while I work. Only eats the best, most expensive food. Will NEVER greet you at the door after a long day or give you unconditional love when you're down. Does not bite but she can be mean as hell! So........anyone interested in my 30 year old, selfish, wicked, gold-digging wife? Come and get her! Me and my dog want her re-homed! |
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Coffee Shop Admin, Acting Chair of Melksham Rail User Group, Option 24/7 Melksham Rep
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broadgage
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« Reply #6 on: February 18, 2017, 21:46:56 » |
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Seen in the local pub
"THIS IS A PUB AND NOT A PLAYGROUND. UNATTENDED OR ILL BEHAVED CHILDREN WILL BE REMOVED AT PARENTAL RISK AND EXPENSE, AND SOLD AS SLAVES"
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A proper intercity train has a minimum of 8 coaches, gangwayed throughout, with first at one end, and a full sized buffet car between first and standard.
It has space for cycles, surfboards,luggage etc.
A 5 car DMU▸ is not a proper inter-city train. The 5+5 and 9 car DMUs are almost as bad.
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Chris from Nailsea
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« Reply #7 on: February 18, 2017, 22:31:41 » |
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That's perhaps rather harsh. Selling ill (but apparently behaved) children as slaves seems uncommercial: I'd rather try to sell badly-behaved children as slaves.  |
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William Huskisson MP▸ was the first person to be killed by a train while crossing the tracks, in 1830. Many more have died in the same way since then. Don't take a chance: stop, look, listen.
"Level crossings are safe, unless they are used in an unsafe manner." Discuss.
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johnneyw
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« Reply #8 on: February 18, 2017, 23:15:46 » |
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There was a "Man Creche" sign outside a pub in Salcombe that exercised some contributors to the local press a couple of years ago. Something to do with partners going shopping. I could never work out who it was supposed to be offending. The only offence I saw was eye watering prices there.
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Chris from Nailsea
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« Reply #9 on: February 18, 2017, 23:22:40 » |
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The Fortescue?  |
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William Huskisson MP▸ was the first person to be killed by a train while crossing the tracks, in 1830. Many more have died in the same way since then. Don't take a chance: stop, look, listen.
"Level crossings are safe, unless they are used in an unsafe manner." Discuss.
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