The Severnside Sirens would be a great name for a band.
When I moved to Lawrence Weston from central Bristol in 2006, nobody warned me about the sirens' existence or their monthly test. Having a siesta one afternoon, not long after moving in (they're tested at 3pm on the 3rd of each month), I was somewhat scared and bewildered when awoken by the test. I thought it was the end of days!
Never really got used to them. Scare the bejeebus out of you if you happen to be walking by one as it goes off. I always seemed to be either dozing or walking past the Lawrence Weston one at 3pm on the 3rd.
Now, the sirens are to warn of serious industrial incidents on the Avonmouth industrial area. At least that's what the powers that be want you to believe. One resident of Portishead recently shared the truth though:
"Don't panic when you hear loud sirens at 3pm tomorrow. "As long as you take the right precautions beforehand, you'll be fine. "See, every month, at 3pm on the third day, an alien spaceship lands in an unused building somewhere in Avonmouth Docks, its evil crew proceeding to violently kidnap people within a few miles' radius before disappearing back to their faraway galaxy. "Obviously we don't know exact numbers, as nobody's ever returned. That notwithstanding, an educated guesstimate is that the bloodthirsty demons are not satisfied until they've captured around 250 everyday people like you and me. Like your parents, like your children. However, we are confident that they only snatch people carelessly wandering outdoors... "...so, as long as tomorrow - and on every third day of every month - you lock yourselves in, you should be just about fine. And don't look out of your windows. Never. Look out. Of your windows. At 3pm. On the third day. Never. Ever. Ever.
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