Train GraphicClick on the map to explore geographics
 
I need help
FAQ
Emergency
About .
Travel & transport from BBC stories as at 04:35 03 May 2024
- Protesters held as asylum seekers' transfer thwarted
- Train strikes: How May's disruption affects you
Read about the forum [here].
Register [here] - it's free.
What do I gain from registering? [here]
 18/05/24 - BRTA Westbury
22/05/24 - WWRUG / TransWilts update
02/06/24 - Summer Timetable starts
17/08/24 - Bus to Imber

On this day
3rd May (1954)
Lochluichart new station opens (link)

Train RunningShort Run
21:45 Penzance to London Paddington
Delayed
This is
PollsThere are no open or recent polls
Abbreviation pageAcronymns and abbreviations
Stn ComparatorStation Comparator
Rail newsNews Now - live rail news feed
Site Style 1 2 3 4
Next departures • Bristol Temple MeadsBath SpaChippenhamSwindonDidcot ParkwayReadingLondon PaddingtonMelksham
Exeter St DavidsTauntonWestburyTrowbridgeBristol ParkwayCardiff CentralOxfordCheltenham SpaBirmingham New Street
May 03, 2024, 04:49:16 *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Forgotten your username or password? - get a reminder
Most recently liked subjects
[216] Vintage film - how valid are these issues today?
[102] Severn Tunnel emergency closure, 2nd May 2024.
[69] Train drivers "overwhelmingly white middle aged men"
[66] Rail unions strike action 2022/2023/2024
[38] Leven, Fife, Scotland, fast forward a month
[28] underground plans for Bristol update.
 
News: A forum for passengers ... with input from rail professionals welcomed too
 
   Home   Help Search Calendar Login Register  
Pages: [1]
  Print  
Author Topic: Slow news day, so..... punning headlines please.....  (Read 2536 times)
JayMac
Data Manager
Hero Member
******
Posts: 18928



View Profile
« on: September 03, 2010, 13:02:30 »

Not much to report from FGW (First Great Western) land today so I've cast the net a little wider with two vaguely rail related news items.

From the Daily Mail:

Quote
Two young goats that wandered onto the thin ledge of a 60ft railway bridge had to be rescued by a crane after two days high above a remote highway. The poor animals' plight was only discovered when a passing motorist contacted a local charity and alerted them to the situation. Rimrock Humane Society called the police, who then enlisted the help of a local coal mine to bring in a crane and pluck the animals to safety near Roundup, southern Montana.

The young female animals, weighing about 30lb each, mostly stayed on the angled ledge - even though there was a wider surface area on a pillar just a few feet away.

continues...

And from the BBC» (British Broadcasting Corporation - home page):

Quote
A lorry carrying breakfast cereal has collided with a railway bridge in Wiltshire, shedding its load into the road.

A Wiltshire Police spokesman said the Ready Brek which the vehicle was carrying is expected to take a while to clear up.

The crash happened on Wootton Bassett Road, heading into Swindon.

One lane of the road has been closed and drivers are being asked to find an alternative route if possible.

Now in the best traditions of tabloid journalism, let's see who can provide the best punning headlines for these stories.

 Wink



Logged

"Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the rest of the day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."

- Sir Terry Pratchett.
Chris from Nailsea
Administrator
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 17900


I am not railway staff


View Profile Email
« Reply #1 on: September 03, 2010, 18:10:23 »

Crane Helps Roundup Kids

 Roll Eyes
Logged

William Huskisson MP (Member of Parliament) was the first person to be killed by a train while crossing the tracks, in 1830.  Many more have died in the same way since then.  Don't take a chance: stop, look, listen.

"Level crossings are safe, unless they are used in an unsafe manner."  Discuss.
JayMac
Data Manager
Hero Member
******
Posts: 18928



View Profile
« Reply #2 on: September 03, 2010, 18:15:25 »

Not a headline, but I thought:

A police spokesmen said, "Wiltshire folk are being asked to find an alternative breakfast cereal, or come along to to Wootton Basset Road with some hot milk and a spoon!"

 Grin
Logged

"Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the rest of the day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."

- Sir Terry Pratchett.
bigdaz
Guest
« Reply #3 on: September 03, 2010, 19:29:02 »

First one:

Heidi hole round up gets on my goat!



Second one:

First portion of this cereal report...
Logged
caliwag
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 342


View Profile
« Reply #4 on: September 03, 2010, 19:42:06 »

Haha...on the XC (Cross Country Trains (franchise)) from Plymouth to York the other day (OK I'd rather go via KGX to stretch the legs, and have beer in the Bree Louise), but we stopped just shy of Tamworth because of "a swan on the line...a protected species". Driver set off to wave it away...marvellous...just like the old railway.
Said conductor...a fine fella, came through after Tamworth..."any tickets from Tamworth? anyone lost a swan?" well it made me laugh. Grin
Logged
JayMac
Data Manager
Hero Member
******
Posts: 18928



View Profile
« Reply #5 on: September 03, 2010, 19:57:42 »

Bleedin' Swans! Surprising how often they cause problems on the rail network. This ain't the first time I've redirected to this post:

http://www.firstgreatwestern.info/coffeeshop/index.php?topic=6821.msg67780#msg67780

Brenda* ought to sort out her flock!  Grin




*Her Majesty Queen Elizebeth II, so called by Private Eye.
Logged

"Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the rest of the day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."

- Sir Terry Pratchett.
Phil
Global Moderator
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 2044



View Profile
« Reply #6 on: September 03, 2010, 20:19:50 »

1. Thankyou, I'll get my goat

2. Cereal story (abridged)
Logged
johoare
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 2818


View Profile
« Reply #7 on: September 03, 2010, 23:36:21 »

Haha...oOK I'd rather go via KGX to stretch the legs, and have beer in the Bree Louise

But the Bree Louise is just outside Euston? Which although not a million miles from Kings Cross, is also further away than a lot of other places?  Smiley
Logged
caliwag
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 342


View Profile
« Reply #8 on: September 04, 2010, 10:49:04 »

Ah, but as a CAMRA member I get 50p off each pint, which brings the price of a beer sensibly back to Northern prices...well York anyway...sorry no pun! Cool
Logged
Do you have something you would like to add to this thread, or would you like to raise a new question at the Coffee Shop? Please [register] (it is free) if you have not done so before, or login (at the top of this page) if you already have an account - we would love to read what you have to say!

You can find out more about how this forum works [here] - that will link you to a copy of the forum agreement that you can read before you join, and tell you very much more about how we operate. We are an independent forum, provided and run by customers of Great Western Railway, for customers of Great Western Railway and we welcome railway professionals as members too, in either a personal or official capacity. Views expressed in posts are not necessarily the views of the operators of the forum.

As well as posting messages onto existing threads, and starting new subjects, members can communicate with each other through personal messages if they wish. And once members have made a certain number of posts, they will automatically be admitted to the "frequent posters club", where subjects not-for-public-domain are discussed; anything from the occasional rant to meetups we may be having ...

 
Pages: [1]
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.2 | SMF © 2006-2007, Simple Machines LLC Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
This forum is provided by customers of Great Western Railway (formerly First Great Western), and the views expressed are those of the individual posters concerned. Visit www.gwr.com for the official Great Western Railway website. Please contact the administrators of this site if you feel that the content provided by one of our posters contravenes our posting rules (email link to report). Forum hosted by Well House Consultants

Jump to top of pageJump to Forum Home Page